Murphy?s Love: Advice on Intimacy and RelationshipsNovember 28, 2012

November 28, 2012

DEAR STACY,

*My friend is getting married in the spring. He and his fianc?e asked me to do a reading at the wedding and I was happy to say yes. But in the meantime, she and I have had a few dis- agreements about politics and religion. Nothing earth shattering, but we do come at these things from different sides. It?s been highlighted at a few gatherings lately. Regardless of whether my friend agrees with my take on things (but, he does), her reaction to my views has been sur- prising. She has gotten angry and then pouted, ruining the evening for everyone else. Now my buddy tells me she doesn?t want me to do the reading anymore, because we ? fundamentally disagree? about faith. It?s their wedding, and I am happy to do (or not do) whatever they want, but I think this whole incident is highlighting something very wrong about their relationship. She is controlling and manipulative, and forces him to take sides against his closest friends. This doesn?t bode well for a long-term commit- ment, right? I?d like it if a friend of mine helped me avoid this kind of mistake. What do I do?*

*-Worried about my friend*

DEAR WORRIED:

I?ve said it before, but we outsiders really have no idea of what is actually going on inside another couple?s relationship. Thinking that we do is a real mind trap, so proceed with caution. (Notice me totally sidestepping the issue of mix- ing politics and religion at social gatherings…)

There is such a fine line between want- ing to help and sounding like you are trashing someone. If you do want to make your concerns known, be careful to read the situation and keep yourself out of the details. What I mean is, if Buddy actually is experiencing Fianc?e?s behav- ior as manipulative, but is not quite at the place where he can articulate it, you might become just the scapegoat his unconscious mind may be looking for. Here are some dos and don?ts if you decide to pursue the conversation:

-Do sit down with Buddy and gently tell him you are supportive of him, but concerned about Fianc?e?s attitude when faced with an opposing opinion.

-Don?t attack Fianc?e?s character in any way.

-Do pay close attention to Buddy?s reaction to your concern.

-Don?t push it.

-Do accept the verdict that you are not doing a reading at the wedding.

-Don?t bring it up again.

-Do remind him that you are there for him, whatever happens.

-Don?t mistake your role in all this ? you are his friend, but that does not mean you get a vote on this relationship.

*Stacy Notaras Murphy is a licensed professional counselor and certified Imago Relationship therapist practicing in Georgetown. Her website is www.stacy- murphyLPC.com. This column is meant for entertain- ment only and should not be considered a substitute for professional counseling. Send your confidential question to stacy@georgetowner.com.*

Murphy?s Love: Advice on Intimacy and RelationshipsNovember 14, 2012

November 14, 2012

**DEAR STACY,**

*I would like to comment on a recent column about an underemployed husband (Murphy?s Love, Oct. 3, 2012). I like your suggestion to the wife of the underemployed husband about how she can constructively represent his situation to those who ask about his job search. However, I believe that he was mischaracterized as some- one going through denial. Instead, he feels embarrassed because others may judge him by his employment status. That certainly will happen if he lives in the Washington, D.C., region.*

*Also, if he tells others that he is employed in a sales job, others will forever label him as a salesman without considering that it is an interim job for him. (While shopping or ordering coffee, people often forget that the people behind the counter may have goals outside of their current employment.) As do all people, the underemployed spouse wants to be understood, but he knows that most communication, including what job-search experts call ?networking,? does not promote understanding.*

*As someone who has a master?s degree and has been unemployed or underemployed for most of the last ten years, I speak from experience. For what it?s worth, I am single and 47-years-old. I haven?t any further advice for the wife because your advice is exactly what she and her husband need and because she seems to otherwise be enduring the situation very well.*

*?Sympathetic Underemployed Man*

**DEAR SYMPATHETIC:**

Thanks for the feedback. I definitely hear your argument, particularly with pop culture?s more recent interpretation of ?denial? as a derogatory term (e.g. ?it ain?t just a river in Egypt?). As part of a larger grief process, however, the denial stage is simply the period when we experience or re-experience the shock of a loss and find ourselves trying to return to the reality we had before things changed. This when we say ?Everything?s ok!? even when it?s not. It?s a coping strategy that is in no way a personal failing. My perspective was that if Underemployed Husband was in denial about his change in circumstance, it?s just a part of a natural grief process.

Your point about him feeling embarrassed and worrying about being labeled makes a lot of sense ? particularly, as you said, in our fair city, which while wonderful in many ways, has a ten- dency to be somewhat unfair in terms of status and judgment. I agree, embarrassment is quite different from denial, and I can imagine that if Underemployed Husband is, indeed, embarrassed, being told that he?s just going through a ?grief phase? would feel discouraging, at best, or humiliating, at worst. There?s no room for the latter in a healthy coupling. Thank you for the reminder.

*Stacy Notaras Murphy is a licensed professional counselor and certified Imago Relationship therapist practicing in Georgetown. Her website is www.stacymurphyLPC.com. This column is meant for entertainment only and should not be considered a substitute for professional counseling. Send your confidential question to stacy@georgetowner.com.*

Something’s Brewing in Virginia

November 6, 2012

It’s hard to believe that summer is really winding down. One of the best things about summer dining is pairing a seasonal beer with seafood or barbecue. With fall and Oktoberfest just around the corner, take a look at these breweries and gastropubs in northern Virginia. Interested in making our own homebrew? You’ll find everything you need and more.

Beach Brewing Company, Virginia Beach
This microbrewery and tap room is open six days a week for hopheads to taste and shop their selection. The husband-and-wife team of Justin and Kristin McDonald have operated the brewery and tasting room. The Hammerhead IPA and Hoptopus Double IPA should provide the hoppy flavor enthusiasts vie for. The SeaDevil Stout is a darker beer to enjoy moving into the fall. Summer is coming to a close, but there are plenty of reasons to get back to Virginia Beach. Beach Brewing Company is located at 2585 Horse Pasture Rd. #204, Virginia Beach, Va. 23453. For more information, call 757-563-BEER or go to www.beachbrewingcompany.com

Blue Lab Brewing Company, Lexington
Blue Lab Brewing Company is a brewery and tasting room that has the ultimate small town feel. The brewery periodically hosts live musicians and is deeply rooted in its community. Both founders are affiliated with Washington and Lee University. Tom Lovell is the assistant director of alumni affairs and Bill Hamilton is an associate professor of biology. The two are quick to discourage anyone under 21 years old from even thinking of drinking their beer, as they mention on their website. Blue Lab’s chocolate coffee stout uses local coffee beans, chocolate and hops to create a delicious dark beer. Blue Lab Brewing Company is located at 123 South Randolph St., Lexington Va. 24450. For more information, call 540-548-0146 or visit www.bluelabbrewing.com

Holy Brew Brewing Company, Leesburg
Holy Brewing Company is a rock-and-roll branded brewing company located in Leesburg. Its Honey Blonde Ale, Brown Ale and “Liquid Confession” are distributed around Virginia. Check them out at www.holybrew.com

Beer Run, Charlottesville
This gastrobpub in Charlottesville is about as full-service as you can get. Serving lunch and dinner Monday through Saturday and a gourmet brunch on Sunday, the restaurant carries hundreds of beers from around the world. The gastropub even sells kegs. Weekly events include Pint Night on Tuesdays, free beer tastings on Wednesdays, free wine tastings on Fridays, and Belgian beer night every Sunday. Beer Run is located at 156 Carlton Rd. Suite 203, Charlottesville, Va. 22902. You can reach the pub at 434-984-BEER or at www.beerun.com

Horse & Hound Gastropub, Charlottesville
Horse & Hound Gastropub features a gourmet dinner and brunch menu that pairs craft beers with fine dining. The pub offers customers the option of ordering beers in six-ounce glasses to maximize the number of tastings during their meal. Chefs Luther and Brooke Fedora are the founders of the Horse and Hound. Both chefs trained at the Culinary Institute of America. Executive chef Luther Fedora worked for several years in London as a chef, and has served as a sommelier at classic London spots such as the Savoy and Drones. Brooke worked as a pastry chef in Manhattan before the couple moved to Charlottesville in 2003.

Fermentation Trap, Barboursville
Many of the brewers here began their businesses when curiosity pushed them to brew their own beer at home. With some basic equipment and knowhow, you too can begin crafting your own signature beer. The Fermentation Trap sells starter kits, ingredients and more advanced equipment for making beer and wine. Everything in the store is also available online for those interested in browsing their selection. The website also hosts the GHRUB club—Grapes and Hops Unedited Banter. The club’s website hosts forums, newsletters and podcasts all devoted to the making of beer and wine at home. The Fermentation Trap is located at 6420 Seminole Trail #12, Seminole Place Plaza, Barboursville, Va. 22923. For more information, call 434-985-2192 or visit www.fermentationtrap.com
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Great Getaways to the Blue Ridge, Poconos or Golden Pond


As the summer winds down, there is still time for one last, luxurious vacation. Whether you are looking for a secluded, romantic getaway or a good, old-fashioned family trip, these lavish hotels are sure to suit your needs.

The Lodge at Woodloch
If it is relaxation that you seek, sneak away to The Lodge at Woodloch, a destination spa resort in Hawley, Pa. Treat yourself to the Lodge’s Restorative Herbal massage at the spa, strike a pose during group yoga class, or go on an outdoor adventure through the Pocono Mountains.

That’s only the beginning. Director of public relations for the Lodge, Brooke Jennings, said the serenity of the resort’s location, the multitude of activities and the emphasis on the great outdoors coincide with the Lodge’s mission of “personal awakening and bringing nature in.”

“Sometimes, you get so caught up in life,” she said. “So, it’s nice to go up to the Lodge and realize who you are, find your passions again and get energized and excited about life.”

In its 58 rooms, guests are free to lounge on a private veranda and gaze at the beauty of nature that surrounds them. With three on-site gardens, which produce fresh herbs, the Lodge aims to promote a healthier lifestyle to its guests.

“One of our most popular programs is our Herbal Workshop,” Jennings said. “Our herbalist teaches people how to balance their bodies with nature.”

However, Jennings said, a key element to the Lodge is choice. Guests have an infinite amount of options to choose from to help them clear their minds. Such choices include a game of golf at the Country Club at Woodloch Springs’s 18-hole championship course, a dip in the Lodge’s Aqua Garden with Hydrotherapy WaterWalls or a group or one-on-one training session in the CardioWeight Studio.

“Some people are going to [the Lodge] to relax and some are going to do a lot of activities,” Jennings said. “We cultivate choice of how much or how little a guest wants to do.”

From Aug. 16 to 18, the Lodge will host an artistically invigorating series of workshops, “Nurture Your Creativity,” at no cost to guests. Activities will include sketching, painting, creative writing, baking, and more. For more information, visit thelodgeatwoodloch.com or call 866-953-8500 to make a reservation.

The Goodstone Inn and Estate

Coziness and comfort are merely an hour away at the Goodstone Inn & Restaurant. Sprawling over 265 acres, this historic and pristinely private estate is nestled in the heart of Middleburg, Va. Equipped with a renovated barn that houses a spa and an award-winning restaurant serving Modern American-French country cuisine, the Goodstone is perfect for a weekend escape.

Guests are welcome to partake in the Goodstone’s Goose Creek Picnics where they can enjoy snacking on an assortment of food prepared by executive chef William Walden. For more adventurous guests, hiking, walking and canoeing are also popular activities.

Marketing head Jane Rader said the traditional style of the Goodstone adds to its appeal.
“It’s so old world,” she said. “But it’s got every amenity.”

The 18 guest rooms of the more-than 200-year-old establishment have dramatic views of the picturesque Blue Ridge Mountains, and each are decorated in a French country style. Rader said the Goodstone’s peaceful atmosphere is what captures guests’ hearts.

“It has a beautiful feel,” she said. “It’s a little bit of heaven on earth.”

She added that top-of-the-line clientele, including celebrities and politicians, have been known to flee to the Goodstone for a relaxing stay. Moreover, the estate has become a premiere wedding location.

Until Aug. 31, the Goodstone is featuring a “Summer Indulgence Getaway” package for those looking for a weekend of peace and quiet. Featuring a one or two-night stay, two passes to a local vineyard for wine tasting, and a Goodstone Spa gift, this is one soothing stay you won’t want to get away. To learn more about this historic haven of relaxation, explore goodstone.com, or call 570-687-3333 for a reservation.

The Manor on Golden Pond

Fall in love all over again at the Manor on Gold Pond. Owners Brian and Mary Ellen Shields know how to treat guests to a weekend of romance at the luxurious New Hampshire resort.

As the inspiration for the Academy Award-winning film, “On Golden Pond,” starring Katherine Hepburn and Henry Fonda, the Manor’s dreamy allure and 12-acre stretch are bound to entrance guests. Brian said the quietness and quality service are what give the Manor top marks.

“It is targeted as a romantic getaway,” he said. “It has a nice sense of space.”

The 24-room property features real wood-burning fireplaces and two exquisite restaurants. At Van Horn Dining Room, guests are offered season dishes and more than 200 wines to choose from, while M Bistro includes organic French food options. For those in need of pampering, Brian suggests one of the many spa packages.

“All of the spa packages include the spa lunch,” he said. “The ‘Thirst Quencher’ has become very popular.”

Lose your troubles in 100 minutes of ecstasy. Enjoy an herbal body butter wrap, a facial, aromatherapy hand and foot treatments, and a spa lunch served with the house wine. If sports are more your speed, grab a tennis racquet for a game on the Manor’s clay court or slip into a bathing suit for a swim in the oversized, outdoor, heated pool. At the end of the day, delight in the English décor of the guest rooms of this lovely bed and breakfast. If you and your love would like a holiday away, visit manorongoldenpond.com or call 603-968-3348.

Other Resting Retreats

The Inn at Irving Place (New York) — Just a hop, skip, and a jump from Greenwich Village and Soho, this nurturing nook nestled in two refurbished townhouses treats guests like Victorian socialites. If seclusion is your style, then this very private hotel will suit you perfectly. Without a sign in front to denote its location, the hustle and bustle of New York City is the least of your worries. Revel in the large, European-style guest rooms or enjoy an afternoon five-course tea and delectable finger foods at Lady Mendel’s Tea Salon. Seek out serenity at 212-533-4600, or visit innatirving.com.

The Inn at Montchanin Village (Delaware) – At this timeless estate, guests are welcome to experience a long, relaxing weekend in one of the 11 restored houses dating from 1799 to 1910. Snuggle up to an inviting fire, enjoy the solitude of a private, landscaped courtyard, or take in the amenities of the modern age at the Spa at Montchanin Village. Call 302-888-2133 or visit montchanin.com to find out more.
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Shepherds Manor Creamery: A Whirlwind of Sheep Dairy


Nestled in the farmlands of New Windsor, Md., Shepherds Manor Creamery is the premiere destination for sheep cheese in the state. As one of approximately 100 sheep dairy farms in the United States, Shepherds Manor produces artisan sheep cheese and soap.

Sheep dairy farmers and proprietors of Shepherds Manor Creamery, Colleen and Michael Histon, participated in this year’s Chefs Go Fresh motorcycle rally. As hosts of the first stop on the excursion, the two gave visiting chefs a private tour of their sheep milking and cheese aging facilities. The Histons ended their presentation with samples of their artisan cheeses including feta and tome for the chefs.

“It was kind of a whirlwind,” Colleen Histon said of Chefs Go Fresh. “I thought it was great to meet all the people that we met but I wish we’d had more time so that we could show people more of the facility.”

The farm was awarded with the Carroll County Department of Economic Development’s Agribusiness Award in 2011 and has gained much notoriety for their agricultural diversity. Histon said that after Chefs Go Fresh, she and her husband were able to network with many of the chefs and restaurant owners.

“I was happy for the exposure and we did try to connect with some of the people that expressed interest,” she said. “We did get a few business cards and are actually planning on trying to use that information to contact them at a later date.”

As the Histons continue to expand their sheep cheese empire, their next big cheese showcase will be at the 29th annual Maryland Wine Festival from Sept. 15 to 16. For more information on Shepherds Manor Creamery, visit shepherdsmanorcreamery.com or call (240) 388-6633 to set up a visit. ?

MURPHY’S LOVE: On Tough Questions, Loneliness and Desserts


DEAR STACY:

My boyfriend of four years just moved into
my apartment in February. This is a big step for
us – we’re both 27 – and we took a lot of time
making this decision. Now I am finding myself
expecting an engagement ring at any moment,
even though he hasn’t mentioned anything about
getting engaged. I realize that when we decided
to move in together, part of me assumed this
was a precursor to getting married, although we
haven’t talked about it that way. In fact, thinking
back to many of our past conversations, it
seemed that my boyfriend was making the point
that moving in specifically was not a precursor
to marriage (e.g.: “This will just make things
more convenient for us,” and “It makes sense
financially” and “Let’s make sure our parents
don’t get the wrong idea and specifically explain
that we are not engaged…”) So I basically lied
to him by agreeing with his take on the situation
and have been lying to myself ever since. On top
of it all, I keep smashing through my desserts in
the hope of finding a ring at the bottom. Then,
I’m disappointed and kind of mean to him for the
rest of the night. What should I do

-Dessert Disaster

DEAR DESSERT:
First, please try not to be so hard on yourself.
You recognize that you are making your
Boyfriend pay for something he didn’t necessarily
order – that takes a lot of self awareness. You
didn’t lie to him. You entered into the agreement
with your conscious brain saying, “Sure, this
makes sense!” But when your unconscious brain
begins to revolt, it’s not a case of having been
dishonest with Boyfriend, you just were not as
conscious as you might want to be. I’d imagine
you were simply following his lead because the
idea of conflict around this is very frightening to
you. Let’s talk about that.

Many people in relationships are afraid to
ask for what they specifically want. We start
from the standpoint: “I’m not going to get it
anyway.. So, why put myself in a position of
being vulnerable?” But that is what love is, at
its best. Love is about being yourself, claiming
your feelings and making yourself available to
another person. If Boyfriend’s quotes are to be
believed, it sounds like you are partnering up
with someone just as scared of being vulnerable
and honest as you are. I have no idea if your true
wants are the same, but it appears that neither of
you are putting them out there. No wonder it’s
so confusing.

I’d recommend a sincere conversation. As
usual, focus on your own feelings, try not to
point fingers, and remain as calm as possible
so that his defenses do not prevent him from
hearing your message. What’s the message? “It
appears that I want more from this relationship,
and I’d like to know your honest, careful and
specific thoughts about whether that’s something
you want to provide.” Leave it at that. This
doesn’t need to be an all-or-nothing negotiation,
just an all-cards-on-the-table conversation.

DEAR STACY:

My wife doesn’t want to have sex as much
as I want. We have discussed this; we even went
to therapy. Nothing has changed. I am thinking
about maybe having an affair. It would be nothing
emotional, because I still love my wife. My
needs just aren’t being met and she has pushed
me to this. I am worrying about the possible
guilt, however. I wish I could just explain the
situation to her and perhaps she would agree
that I can find someone for sex only? We have
two kids in high school. So, I don’t want to do
anything that puts our family at risk.

–Lonely and Looking

DEAR LONELY:

Thanks for writing in about what I know is
a tough, although common, topic. I hope you
notice that I am responding to “Lonely” and not
“Looking.” I can hear that you are lonely, but I
don’t think “Looking” is who you really want to
be. Let me explain.

People get married for many reasons, but
just sex is never one of them. Especially not for
a father of two who readily admits he still loves
his wife and has tried couples therapy. No, that
person is maybe, possibly and perhaps looking
outside his marriage because he is depressed
and wanting to feel connected to someone,
namely, his wife. I’m sure you already know that
the root of her low sexual desire could be physiological,
emotional or inconclusive. Meanwhile,
you didn’t give numbers. So, we also cannot
rule out that you actually might have an elevated
sex drive with roots that are also physiological,
emotional or inconclusive. In other words, this
is a very subjective subject.

At the end of the day, your wants do not
match up with those of Wife, the one person to
whom you have committed yourself for many
years, created a home with and raised a family.
Wow. That does feel lonely and depressing, and
fantasizing about some new options makes a
lot of sense. But let’s brainstorm for other ideas
(see a doctor together; negotiate a schedule that
meets you both halfway; see a certified sex
therapist) that don’t, as you say, put your family
“at risk.” Because an affair will put your family
at risk. No doubt. Guaranteed.

Trust me, an “unemotional” affair won’t
work out the way you are imagining it could.
Otherwise, you would already have an open
marriage and wouldn’t be asking my opinion.
Even if Wife heard you, understood you and told
you all was well, this decision will change the
way she views you. It also will change the way
she views your family, and – most insidious and
damaging – change the way she sees herself.
That’s a very long road to repair. Do this the
right way. Go back to therapy; go back to talking
about it. Don’t turn this into something that
she’s “pushed” you to do. Make these decisions
together.

Stacy Notaras Murphy is a licensed professional
counselor and certified Imago Relationship therapist
practicing in Georgetown. Her website is www.stacymurphyLPC.
com
, and you can follow her on twitter @
StacyMurphyLPC. This column is meant for entertainment
only and should not be considered a substitute for
professional counseling. Send your confidential question
to stacy@georgetowner.com. [gallery ids="102463,120867" nav="thumbs"]

Murphy’s Love: The Emotional Chaos of Unemployment


DEAR STACY,

My husband was laid off from his job last year and spent eight months looking for some- thing in his old profession (consulting). He finally took a job in sales over the summer, but is now making 30 percent less with this new job and is spending a lot more time at work. We knew all of this before he decided to take the job, and we both said we would live with these challenges, because he really needed to do something.

I’m not writing for advice about how to deal with this life change. It’s a major change, and we’re dealing with it. What I need is advice about how to approach this with our friends and family. My husband has not even allowed me to tell my parents he found a new job. He hasn’t told his own family yet, and we aren’t talking about it with friends or people at our child’s school, all of whom knew he was laid off, have been kind and have asked how things have been going. He tells me that this job is just a “place- holder,” and he doesn’t want people to think that he has changed careers. Someone gave him the advice that it might prevent people from think- ing of him when it comes to jobs in his preferred field. Whether or not I think that’s valid advice (sorry, I really don’t), it’s making it very difficult when people ask me what’s going on. He doesn’t seem to understand that I get that question a lot more often than he does, and that just changing the subject doesn’t work every time.
–Nothing to Say

Dear Nothing to Say,

First, I am very sorry that your family is dealing with this incredibly difficult situation. You are specifically asking for help with managing the outside view of this experience, and that part really sounds like a public relations night- mare. You are the involuntary spokesperson for this organization (aka your family), and as in most corporate crises, your partner (Husband) is too frazzled to really understand the role you’re playing. So I’d advise you to get out of that job. First, though, a little perspective on what Husband might actually be going through.
To me, this sounds like a grief stage – denial. I know we have covered this topic in this space before, but Elisabeth Kübler-Ross’s famous five stages of grief (denial, anger, bar- gaining, depression and acceptance) often don’t occur in a manner that is at all linear or time- limited. It is likely that your husband went back to mourning his previous job upon making the decision to take his new position. No matter how upfront and honest you both were about the results of taking a job that requires more time to pay less money, that decision still has its emo- tional shockwaves. Asking you, demanding you to play the PR role with your friends and family is likely part of his denial process.

The good news is that his denial is a process. The bad news is that his denial is his process, so we can’t just talk him out of it or convince him of some new way of looking at it. What we can do is give you some language for excusing yourself from mouthpiece duty.

When those well-meaning folks ask you about his job search, you do not have to lie. Simply follow his script. Say he’s found a place- holder, but that he’s still interested in finding something in XYZ consulting. Then shift the conversation by asking if the person has any leads. You never know, that person just may be waiting for you to ask.

Stacy Notaras Murphy is a licensed profes- sional counselor and certified Imago Relationship therapist practicing in Georgetown. Her website is www.stacymurphyLPC.com, and you can follow her on Twitter @StacyMurphyLPC. This column is meant for entertainment only, and should not be considered a substitute for professional counseling. Send your confidential question to stacy@georgetowner.com.

Riding To Buy Fresh


In 2007, the Southern Maryland Agricultural Development Commission started the Buy Local Challenge (BLC) to highlight the economic and environmental benefits of sourcing and consuming local ingredients. “And since then,” said Maryland Governor Martin O’Malley, “it’s really taken off across our state.”

“Six years ago,” he said, “you did not see the amount of produce that was available in grocery stores that was advertised as ‘local.’ This movement, this awareness—the future is all about local economies.”

The BLC, along with the Maryland Department of Agriculture, promotes a market-driven and sustainable farming culture, where farmland preservation and environmental stewardship positively impact the quality of the air and water, and where consumers and leaders play equal parts in the development and sustainability of local agriculture. A balanced community should be full of safe, nutritious food and a clean and healthy environment.

On July 16, local Washington and Maryland chefs put their pedals to the metal to promote these initiatives—literally. In an effort to build relationships with area farmers, wine and cheese makers, and purveyors of produce and other farm-raised products, some of our favorite cooks revved up their motorcycles for a bike tour of some Maryland-based farms.

The Chefs Go Fresh tour, a joint function by the Maryland Department of Agriculture and Georgetown Media Group (i.e., yours truly), was a day of friendly chatting, sputtering engines and enlightening connections. The day began with a breakfast hosted by Robert Wiedmaier at his restaurant Brasserie Beck, full of fresh, local fare. From there, the chefs were off, as their bikes roared through downtown before breaking free in the back roads of Maryland countryside, stopping at farms for presentations by farmers.

The first stop was Shepherds Manor Creamery in New Windsor, run by husband-and-wife team Michael and Colleen Histon, who produce artisan sheep’s milk cheese. From there, Black Ankle Vineyards was just down the road. An environmentally sustainable estate vineyard, Black Ankle produces wines with complexity, depth and subtlety to rival old world styles.

The day concluded with a locally-sourced lamb roast hosted by Bryan Voltaggio, local chef darling and native Frederick, Marylander, who was a finalist on television’s “Top Chef” in 2009. His new Fredericksburg restaurant, “Family Meal,” was a fitting location to wrap up this day of camaraderie and culinary affection. Chefs and farmers sat around long tables and bars sharing heaping plates of fried green tomatoes, deviled eggs, country fried chicken, sautéed greens, baked beans and heaps of smoky, delicious lamb.

There is tremendous mutual benefit in supporting local farms, from better and more nutritious ingredients to lessening of energy consumption for food transportation. If everyone across the country embraced the Buy Local Challenge, it would bring a positive and profound impact to our farms, our communities and our planet for generations to come. It’s nice to know that our chefs agree.

Here are some highlights from the day, and the list of chefs that joined Georgetown Media Group on our culinary expedition. ? [gallery ids="129071,128973,128965,128957,128948,128939,128931,128921,128913,128904,128981,128989,129064,129056,129048,129040,129031,129023,129015,129005,128997,128895,128887,128778,128771,128765,129077,128756,129083,128747,129088,129094,128785,128793,128879,128872,128861,128850,128837,128828,128818,128809,128801,100916" nav="thumbs"]

Beat the Heat with Boats and Beaches


For the past few weeks, being out in the sun has been downright masochistic. Stepping outside, the pelting heat was nearly suffocating. On a bicycle, it felt like being blasted by a full body blow-drier. Last Sunday, our city hit 100 degrees for the fourth consecutive day — a natural feat unsurpassed since July 1930. Across the country this year, more than 40,000 daily heat records have been broken, and after the storm that left so many of us without electricity, the heat couldn’t have come at a more inconvenient time.

Wandering around the farmers markets, our local food producers are bemoaning the heat’s effects on this season’s crops. “This is the last week for blueberries, thanks to mother nature,” said one local vendor when I bought a still tasty but admittedly heat-stricken bushel last weekend.

Thankfully, things seem to be easing up outside. This isn’t to say the rest of the summer season is going to be a cakewalk, but we can start thinking again about venturing into the sun and enjoying summer as it should be enjoyed: by the shoreline, in the water, and out at sea.

From George Washington’s crossing of the Delaware River in 1776, to the Kennedys’ iconic yachting excursions that captured in celluloid the idealism and spirit of the late post-war era, Washington, D.C. has scattered bits of its history on the water. The Potomac and Anacostia Rivers wind through our neighborhoods, their beauty and power never failing to refresh the senses. If ever you’re feeling blue, take a walk along the Mt. Vernon trail up by Roosevelt Island beside the Potomac River, watch the birds take flight, breathe the air, wrap yourself in the billowing silence and tell me if you don’t feel at least a little better.

And in the Delmarva area, there are plenty of locations for waterfront escape. The Maryland shore has charm, history and abundant seaside culture. Along the Delaware coastlines, popular beach destinations give way to serene waterfront and unforgettable excursions. The odds are, most of you have your house rentals set up. Here are some great things to do.

Delaware

Coastal Kayak

Offering sailboat rentals, guided kayak and bicycle eco-tours, Coastal Kayak allows guests to experience the bayside marshlands and wildlife from a completely new perspective.

The salt marsh tour is a fanastic addendum to any list of activities. Paddle through the salt marshes around a state wildlife refuge, the feeding grounds for many animals. You’re liable to see herons, osprey, horseshoe crabs and skimmers, among other wildlife. One of the premiere offerings is the exploration of a small sandbar where you get out of your kayak and comb the beach for a variety of beach dwellers such as fiddler crabs, starfish and clams.

Chincoteague and Assateague Islands

Chincoteague Island, just a 30-minute drive from Bethany down Route 1, is Virginia’s only resort island, and one of the more beautiful islands that salt and pepper Virginia’s eastern shore. This rustic, wild-looking beach is famous for its breathtaking and accessible wildlife, oyster beds and clam shoals, migratory birds and packs of wild horses, which often graze casually around the parking area.

Throughout the summer, crowded beaches give way to stretches of secluded shore line, marshes and forests for those willing to walk beyond the crowded entrance. As a Natural Wildlife Preserve, the Chincoteague and Assateague islands harbor plenty of inspiration for the adventurous, Thoreauvian journeyman.

Nassau Valley Vineyards

Producing a wide variety of wines, Nassau Valley is Delaware’s first and only farm winery. The self-guided tour includes a chronicle of wine’s 8,000-year history, up to the processing and production of modern day vineyards. Picnickers are welcome, and specialty tastings and wine and food pairings are available on site or off. Theater and musical groups perform during the summer months. This is an ideal stop on a rainy beach day or a midweek break from the pulsing July sun.

Maryland

The Oxford-Bellevue Ferry

The Oxford-Bellevue Ferry is also a great way to see the surrounding area of Talbot County. America’s oldest privately owned ferry, established 1683, crosses the Tred Avon River between Oxford and Bellevue, Maryland. It’s a quick trip, 7 to 10 minutes (20 round trip) but it’s a lot of fun and St. Michaels is a pleasant seven-mile bike ride or drive from the Bellevue landing. The ferry can carry cars and motorcycles. For more information visit www.OxfordFerry.com.

The Chesapeake Lighthouse Tours

These tours are a unique look at Chesapeake’s lighthouse heritage, which has assisted the passage of boats for centuries. Captain Mike Richards, who guides the tours, has over 35 years’ experience on the Chesapeake Bay and shares stories of these historic lighthouses and their surrounding areas. Half and full-day tours leave from the Bay Hundred Restaurant at Knapps Narrows Marina, through October. For more information, visit www.ChesapeakeLights.com.

The Tilghman Island Marina

The Tilghman Island Marina is a popular destination spot with transient boaters and boating clubs and groups all throughout the bay, who also offer boat rentals and various charters.

The picturesque marina overlooks the Chesapeake Bay and Nature Area. Offering a quaint ambiance in a park-like setting that caters to boating groups and guests, it’s a great place to enjoy a Chesapeake Bay sunset from the comfort and privacy of your own boat. You can also jet ski, sail, bicycle, fish and take waterway tours. Walk, ride or dinghy to all Island attractions, Inns and restaurants. For more information, visit www.TilghmanMarina.com. ?

Chefs Go Fresh: The Stops Along the Route


With the 2nd Annual Chefs Go Fresh event on July 16, here is a closer look at some of the local country farms that will be participating.

England Acres Farm: a Pasture-Fed Welcome Mat

Do you enjoy fresh produce, locally raised animals and home-baked goods? Look no further than the England Acres Farm, in Mt. Airy in Fredrick County, Maryland. The farm, which has been used since the 1870s is owned and operated by Jeff and Judy England.

“We’re friendly,” says Judy England. “We welcome the public to come experience what we have and taste the difference in our products.”

England Acres Farm and Market raises Angus cattle, sheep and Cornish Rock X chickens. The animals are all pasture fed or are fed farm-grown forage. All the meats can be bought individually or in a sampler pack from the market.

The England Acres Farm Market and Bakery is open on Saturday and Sunday, 10 a.m. to 6 p.m. The store offers a selection of fresh baked goods, freshly picked seasonal produce, grass fed beef and lamb and pasture raised chickens, hens and eggs. The market also offers some friendly advice on how to cook and prepare the fresh ingredients.

The working farm welcomes people to come and experience what it’s really like on a farm, and it encourages people to buy local products. For more information or to plan your trip, visit www.EnglandAcres.com

Black Ankle
Vineyards: Award Winner in Mt. Airy

“A truly great wine comes only from a truly great vineyard,” according to Black Ankle Vineyards, a winery located in Mt. Airy, Maryland and known for its award-wining wines. With a wide selection of red-and-white wines, including Chardonnay, Terra Dulce II, Passeggiata and Crumbling Rock, it’s a winery not to miss.

“We grow all our grapes on farms and harvest once a year. We’re able to come up with new wines every year,” said Sarah O’Herron, owner and wine maker at Black Ankle Vineyards. Its most popular selection of wine is Crumbling Rock, with a blend of traditional grapes. It won the Maryland Governor’s Cup for two years in a row. “It’s the wine that made us famous,” O’Herron said.

Have an urge to taste some of the selections? The Black Ankle Vineyards Tasting Room is open Friday, noon to 9 p.m.; Saturday, noon to 6 p.m.; Sunday, noon to 5 p.m.; other days and times are by appointment. A selection of local cheeses is also offered to customers for something to eat alongside the wine. In addition to the sale of wines and food products, Black Ankle Vineyarsds also provides local realtors and restaurants with selections of wine. “We want people who are wine lovers and who are interested in really good wines. We want them to find us,” O’Herron said. Black Ankle Vineyards offers tours every Saturday and Sunday at 1 p.m. For more information, visit www.BlackAnkle.com. ? [gallery ids="100879,127484" nav="thumbs"]