Living

Wally Greeves • July 16, 2014

The analogies between bacon and golf might escape the neophyte leisurist, but any expert loafer in the wild at this moment may have already casually surveyed the frying pan rack, mentally reviewed the contents of his trunk and will soon be pressing #1 for the pro shop. Eating little blueberries and slurping up lobster can only shine brighter when bacon shows her face, while Andrew Wyeth paintings and puffin sightings are truly more appreciated when bookended or framed by a few rounds of golf. Nestled along the Penobscot Bay in Maine between the tidal water towns of Rockland and Rockport, Samoset Resort was my vacation bacon.

Celebrating a centennial of golf in 2002, the course underwent major renovations in the 1970s, and many recent tweaks and additions have landed the resort in the pages of Conde Nast Traveler and Golf Digest for its resort amenities and beautiful views. One hundred and seventy-eight rooms and three cottages are crowned by “The Flume,” a moat surrounded, majestic oceanside residence for rent along hole #15, where actor John Travolta and his wife Kelly Preston supposedly spent their honeymoon night. More recent and weighty geographical significance has surfaced in its cameo role as the house behind the sand trap that I chipped in from to make birdie.

Highlights on the front nine are made even higher by the presence of the Atlantic Ocean on every single hole. Lobstermen dropping traps in the water, puffy white sailboat triangles and Rockland’s Breakwater Lighthouse Trail all come together in bad-shot-erasing panoramic views that put the exclamation point in time already being well spent. Definite front nine favorites for me were holes #3 and #4. The third hole’s uphill tee shot to a green beneath a watercolor-worthy copse of trees could be the textbook case for clubbing up, and the blind shot to reach the #4 green in two could be one of many ways to play the hole. I consider the number of times a golfer has to consider risk and reward in a round a good measure of course architecture, and Samoset has had good architectural input over the years.

The course’s only four non-oceanside string of holes starts out with a very nicely laid out par four on #10. The challenging approach shot over water can only be made harder if you manage to hide behind the one three-inch wide sapling in the middle of the fairway (I did). Hole #11 is a good-looking, spicy little par three with pleasant water fountain white noise to even out swing tempo. The accolades from me for the back nine belong to holes #13 and #14. The spicy little par three’s bar brawling uncle with tattoos makes up the wicked thirteenth par three; it’s a 230-yard shot over water. Any separation anxiety stemming from lack of ocean is more than quelled by the water’s stunning return at the end of the lengthy lounge-chair shaped par 5 number 14 hole, easily my favorite hole at Samoset.

Maine’s humidity-avoiding, transient, late summer population is represented well at Samoset, and it was very easy for me to find people that felt obligated to let me join them. As happens over a round of golf my new friends Bob, Dave, and Fred soon became Bobby, Davey and Freddy. The staff at the club was extremely welcoming, and while I had plans of playing some other nearby courses, it just seemed natural to store my clubs at Samoset when asked. Club professional Gary Soule was very welcoming and fun to talk to, and 94-year-old starter Ray Fogarty, a 34-year course veteran, recently had “Ray’s Creek” dedicated to him for years of service. When I met him at 7 a.m. the other day, he was munching on a Danish with a cartful of empty beer bottles he claimed were just collected for recycling. Having worked at the Samoset as early as 1934, Fogarty remembers when the club had barracks for visiting baseball players that would play exhibition games for guests.

Lobster, organic farms, bird watching, kayaking, biking, hiking, little blueberries, lighthouses, country roads, watercolors, music festivals and gas stations that serve award-winning soups are all reasons I will be back in Maine next summer. This summer, I added golf at the Samoset to the list. [gallery ids="101808,139919,139914" nav="thumbs"]

Stacy Notaras Murphy • July 2, 2014

*Dear Stacy:*

*My wife reads your column, so I am hoping you and I can work together to convince her that she needs some help. She is a stay-at-home mother to our three kids, and she’s fabulous at the job. To make it possible for her to stay at home, I work long hours in a competitive field. We met when I was in law school. She has always known what kind of career I wanted, and for the most part has always been very supportive of my work.*

*In recent months, she has been very needy. She calls me at work and gets upset when I can’t make room in my schedule to talk to her. I think she is overwhelmed by the demands of her position and it is causing her to be depressed. I think she needs therapy and I am happy to pay for it. She refuses, saying she thinks the problem is our relationship. She is insisting we go to couples therapy, but I know that won’t help her. I want her to feel better and have the support I know she will get with her own counselor. Please put better words to my request. I am completely supportive of her and only want her to feel better. She needs help to do that.*

*- Wanting the Best for Her*

Dear Wanting,

I need to start by saying I do not doubt your good intentions here. Not even a little bit. But you are doing this all wrong. No one ever got better when her spouse responded to her loneliness by saying, “Go get yourself some help, I’m buying.” She has asked you to join her in couples therapy – what do you have to lose? If you bristle when thinking about that question, then it seems you actually might benefit from that kind of work.

With the exception of serious mental health disorders, my experience has been that a couple’s relationship is actually the best space for healing. If Dear Wife leaves your dyad, and finds a gentle and caring counselor to walk with her through whatever she’s experiencing, at the end of the day you are not the one witnessing or inspiring that healing. This will put more distance between you. And if you fall into the category of Ambitious-Law-School-Trained-Competitive-Field-Dweller that you describe, I’m guessing that more distance is the last thing your marriage needs.

Work with her to find a couples counselor with a schedule that fits both of your calendars. Leave the rest of the work to that person. If s/he thinks Dear Wife will benefit from individual treatment, trust that s/he will say so. In the interim, consider how much you might learn and how much you both could benefit. If you really want the best, that’s the gold standard.

*Stacy Notaras Murphy (www.stacymurphyLPC.com) is a licensed professional counselor and certified Imago Relationship therapist practicing in Georgetown. This column is meant for entertainment only, and should not be considered a substitute for professional counseling. Send your confidential question to stacy@georgetowner.com.*

Richard Selden •

Andrew Wyeth’s “Wind from the Sea” – the centerpiece of the “Looking Out, Looking In” exhibition at the National Gallery of Art (reviewed in the May 7 issue of The Georgetowner) – was painted a year before and on the same Maine farm as his iconic “Christina’s World” of 1948.

Cushing, Maine, where Christina Olson lived, was the painter’s summer home. Andrew Wyeth’s roots were in Chadds Ford, Pa., where the Brandywine River Museum of Art offers scheduled tours of his studio and the Kuerner Farm, both portrayed in several works in “Looking Out, Looking In.”

“His art is all about sense of place – things that mean something to him, people that mean something to him,” says Virginia O’Hara, the Brandywine museum’s curator of collections.

Upon their marriage in 1940, Andrew and Betsy Wyeth made a 19th-century schoolhouse their home and Andrew’s studio. Restored to look as it did when they lived there, the modest building – white, inside and out – is filled with old furniture, artists’ materials (brushes, a carton of eggs for making tempera paints, large blocks of watercolor paper), books on art, ship models and armies of toy soldiers. The kitchen has “modern” appliances from the 1950s.

Part of the studio is set up as the studio of their son James, known as Jamie, as if he were working on his 1967 portrait of John F. Kennedy. A short distance away is the expansive, prop-filled studio of Andrew Wyeth’s father and teacher, famed illustrator N.C. Wyeth, who built it in 1911 with earnings from his work on Scribner’s edition of “Treasure Island.” (The museum also has scheduled tours of N.C. Wyeth’s studio.)

Even more evocative is the bleakly beautiful farm of German immigrant Karl Kuerner, designated a National Historic Landmark in 2011 along with the Olson House in Cushing. A square, stone trough in front of two windows in the ancient barn is clearly the motif of the painting “Spring Fed” in “Looking Out, Looking In.” Another work in the National Gallery show depicts the farmhouse attic, with iron hooks from which onions and potatoes were hung.

No portraits of Wyeth’s Chadds Ford muse, Helga Testorf, who was Karl Kuerner’s nurse, are part of “Looking Out, Looking In,” but the painter had a way of instilling a human presence in his still lifes (not just art-history talk: in some cases a figure in an initial version of a work was later removed).

Much of the credit for preserving the scenic and historic landscape that Wyeth painted goes to the Brandywine Conservancy, founded in 1967 to protect the watershed. Having created the museum in 1971, the organization – based in a former gristmill off U.S. 1 – recently renamed itself the Brandywine Conservancy and Museum of Art.

A selection of Andrew Wyeth’s watercolors of Chadds Ford from the 1940s through the 2000s (he died in 2009) is on view at the museum through the end of September. “Exalted Nature: The Real and Fantastic World of Charles Burchfield,” an exhibition of more than 50 paintings by a very different American artist, opens Aug. 23.

The only name that looms larger than Wyeth in the Brandywine Valley is du Pont. DuPont, the chemical company, began in 1802 as Éleuthère Irénée du Pont de Nemours’s gunpowder mill on the Brandywine. His little family of Huguenot immigrants from Burgundy expanded in size and wealth in the 19th and 20th centuries to produce some of America’s greatest industrialists and philanthropists.

In 1906, Pierre S. du Pont bought the historic arboretum in Kennett Square, Pa., known as Peirce’s Park, making it his private estate and expanding it to more than 1,000 acres of gardens, fountains and greenhouses. We know it today as Longwood Gardens, welcoming roughly a million visitors annually. The latest addition to Longwood is an 86-acre Meadow Garden. Among the upcoming events are Summer Soirées on July 18 and Aug. 22 (free with admission) and Patti LuPone on July 10 ($45-75) and Savion Glover on Aug. 14 ($36-56).

Winterthur, the Wilmington mansion of one of Pierre’s cousins, Henry Francis du Pont, is furnished with his exceptional collection of American antiques and surrounded by gardens. It is a suitable setting for an audience-broadening Winterthur exhibition, “Costumes of Downton Abbey,” displaying 40 historically inspired costumes from the PBS series (through Jan. 4).

Other Wilmington cultural attractions include the Hagley Museum and Nemours Mansion, both connected to du Ponts, and the Delaware Art Museum, which features works by the Pre-Raphaelites, John Sloan and illustrators such as Howard Pyle.

Good dining choices may be found on State Street in downtown Kennett Square, where there is a monthly First Friday Art Stroll. For a country inn ambiance, try Buckley’s Tavern in Centerville, Pa., on Kennett Pike between Kennett Square and Wilmington.

To make an overnight or a weekend of it, there are 11 B&Bs listed on the Brandywine Valley Bed and Breakfast Association website. The landmark 1913 Hotel du Pont in Wilmington displays works by N.C., Andrew and Jamie Wyeth in its elegant public rooms. [gallery ids="116309,116312" nav="thumbs"]

Jennifer Altemus •

We arrived in Sao Paulo at 8 a.m. to start our World Cup celebration. It’s the Brazilian winter and it was only 59 degrees. We watched a couple of games with friends from Brazil, Chile and Boston, then left that night for our rumble in the jungle.

Our flight to Manaus arrived at 11:30 p.m. We went immediately to our boat, taking us to our floating hotel in the Amazon. On a jungle hike the next morning, we saw enormous spiders, monkeys, gargantuan poison ants and all sorts of other nature.

We left the floating hotel to transfer into town that afternoon to be closer to the stadium. The Portuguese team was staying at our new hotel. Their star player is Ronaldo, considered by some to be the best player in the world right now, and totally hot. Security and paparazzi at our hotel could have been for the president. Our taxi was able to follow their motorcade all the way to the stadium. The blocked-off streets were lined with photo takers. I felt like the Queen of England.

The stadium was brand new and beautiful. There were tons of U.S. fans. Our seats were front row, center. My Queen of England feeling continued. The U.S. had a fantastic game until Portugal’s goal in the final seconds of extra time deflated our spirits. But a tie was still better than expected for our team.

After the game, literally thousands of people from all over the world were dancing in the streets. The locals from Manaus loved Americans. We had a lot of pictures taken and our dance card was full.

The next day, we went out on the Amazon River to where two rivers – Rio Solimoes (from Peru) and Rio Negro – merge and run next to each other for four miles without mixing. The colors and temperatures of the water are completely different. Pretty wild to see.

We spent the evening at the FIFA Fan Fest, where you can watch the matches if you aren’t able to be in the stadium. We and about 30,000 Brazilians watched their team beat Cameroon.

That night we had a 2 a.m. flight to Rio. We stayed on the beach at Copacabana, which was like a no-holds-barred South Beach, if you can imagine. After two days, we had to move on to Recife for the next U.S. game, which we hoped would not be the last.

We played the Germans in a torrential downpour. Being the fair-weather fan that I am, this was not what I signed up for. It was sort of the opposite of my Queen of England feeling. The roads were like rivers, our very high-end hotel room was leaking, cabs were sparse and I didn’t think to pack a raincoat. We found an intrepid driver to take us to the express bus station. We could hear water lapping at the bottom of the cab. I thought we would float away.

The stadium is about an hour outside the city, so we had to join thousands of other wet fans trying to cram onto buses. It somehow all worked out and we made it the stadium in time to get a beer and find our seats before kickoff. Unfortunately, we had excellent seats again, so no overhang. It was a soggy day. And even though the Germans won, the U.S. advanced to the next round, so the celebration was on. More dancing in the streets. And then a nice hot shower.

Of course, the next day the weather was spectacular. We hung out in the sun but didn’t swim in the ocean. Recife is known for its shark attacks (Yikes!). That afternoon, we headed back to Sao Paolo to prepare for Brazil’s first game in the knockout round. I haven’t been to Carnival, but I cannot imagine it is any more festive then what we experienced. Whole areas of the city were cordoned off and mobbed with fans. The Brazilians won in the final seconds and the dancing in the streets continued. But by then we had to fly back to D.C. and catch the games on T.V.

Michelle Galler •

The mountains in the early summer light were luminescent. The wildflowers swayed in the morning breeze. And the sun cast languid shadows across Main Street in the charming, historic town of Washington, Va.

It was one of those perfect days in Rappahannock County that those who live here never seem to take for granted – the days that make visitors wonder why they never discovered the place or why it took them so long to return.

A smiling Buddha and the peaceful tinkling of flowing water welcome the lucky spa-goer as she enters Little Washington Wellness and Spa. One thinks, “It doesn’t get any better than this.” But – it did.

Soft greens, blues and lavenders – tones of the meadows, the rivers and the Blue Ridge Mountains outside – reflect the spa’s connection to the land, to naturopathic pursuits and spiritual harmony. The calming, candlelit treatment rooms, smelling of fresh linens, are a prelude to the repose and relaxation to come.

The spa’s approach is best described as a union of natural healing and serenity with a hefty dollop of luxury.

Spa founder Jackie Meuse wanted to create a retreat where patrons could restore the body as well as the spirit. She is constantly refining, making sure that all of the elements –talented technicians, the best organic products, a setting that is both pretty and restful – coalesce into an excellent spa experience.

After lots of searching for and testing green, nature-based products, she discovered Eminence Organic Skin Care, a Hungarian line that touts its products as being good enough to eat. I can attest to being tempted.

“Having traveled to special healing and wellness places in the States and in China and Thailand, I made it a point to notice all the extra touches that I appreciated in those spots,” said Meuse. “I was sure that I wanted to have a center of wellness that draws upon the positive energy from the mountains and from the people in this wonderful place that is Rappahannock County.”

Her team of experienced and friendly specialists offers a full menu of spa services and detox treatments, with an emphasis on the holistic approach. The massage menu includes hot stone massage, Thai massage and reflexology, plus romantic and relaxing couples massages. An array of facials and body and nail treatments – including microdermabrasion, waxing and brow tinting – is also available.

My Spa Wellness Massage, an hour’s worth of bliss, easily compared to great massages I have had in many a far-flung, exotic location. Massage therapist Dustin Pennington, a graduate of the Virginia School of Massage in Charlottesville, expertly “read” my muscles (including a tightly clenched jaw muscle, a consequence of city living) and vanquished all remnants of soreness and stress. The aromas of warmed herbal and fruit-based unguents and oils seeped into my consciousness as I surrendered to total stress relief.

The Signature Facial, deftly administered by esthetician Ciera Backe, gently dislodged exhausted skin cells and toxins with fragrant strawberry rhubarb dermafoliant and soothing chamomile tonic. Although I was drawn to many of the ambrosial sounding hydrating and skin-boosting masques and serums – including Pumpkin Latte Hydration, Apricot Masque, Lime Stimulating Serum and Key Lime Vanilla Cream, redolent of healthy smoothies – I was guided to the Firm Skin Acai Masque, which limbered up my normally very dry skin. My face felt rejuvenated, gleaming and fresh.

It is important to Meuse, a county resident with her husband, Joe, and mom to two young boys, Hunt and Bo (plus two dogs, three horses, a few dozen chickens and two baby ducks), to ensure that her business serves the community.

“I have always felt so honored to be living where I do,” she said. “I want my neighbors in the county to know that this is for everyone, not just tourists. And I want the talented wellness practitioners who live and work in the county to know that together we are creating a place where everybody can come to feel happy and balanced. In a tight-knit community like ours, you have old-timers and newcomers who want to know they are equally cherished.”

In addition to in-house services, her staff provides mobile spa services to county residents in their homes – including Washingtonians with homes in the county who crawl out through the traffic on weekends. Once they get here, in-home spa services are a very attractive alternative to leaving their country cocoons.

Acknowledging its location in one of the most stunning rural counties in the state, the spa offers guided hikes in the gorgeous Rappahannock County countryside and the Shenandoah National Park, located nearby in Sperryville. For those who just can’t bear to leave, there is even a lovely suite available for weekend stays.

There is a trove of outdoor activities in the county, notably hiking and horseback-riding, along with beautiful wineries, a local distillery of fine bourbon and rye, terrific restaurants and a number of distinctive galleries, antiques shops and boutiques, including the well-stocked spa shop.

Little Washington Wellness and Spa aligns location and setting, making it the perfect spot to unplug and recharge. Even better, there is no need for planes or trains: it’s a pleasant 90-minute drive from Big Washington.

261 Main Street, Washington, Va.
540-675-1031
littlewashingtonspa.com

Michelle Galler, a resident of both Georgetown and Rappahannock County, Va., is a realtor with TTR Sotheby’s and an antiques dealer. [gallery ids="101795,140748,140745" nav="thumbs"]

Mary Bird • June 30, 2014

My recent jaunt to New York City and the Hamptons started in splendid style aboard the Royal Sprinter, a recently introduced luxury van with two daily trips to and from the Big Apple. My uniformed driver, Nacer Abdelisser, arrived ahead of time at our departure point, the Park Hyatt on 24th and M Streets, NW. With no takers for the optional pick-up at Embassy Suites in Chevy Chase, we were on our way.

Each custom-designed Mercedes Sprinter vehicle – equipped with individual reclining leather seats with leg extensions, power outlets, tray tables, seven-inch flat screen monitors with DirecTV and a WiFi connection – can accommodate up to eight passengers. On this occasion, the $90 trip took more than the estimated four hours to reach the Loews Regency Hotel on Park Avenue (New Jersey Turnpike accident, Puerto Rican Day Parade).

The East Side drop-off was particularly convenient as I was headed to the Intercontinental Barclay on 48th Street, under the able management of Hervé Houdré, who spent several years in D.C. at the Intercontinental Willard. My two-night stay allowed me to catch up with old friends and see the exhibitions “Charles James: Beyond Fashion” at the Metropolitan Museum of Art and “Degenerate Art: The Attack on Modern Art in Nazi Germany, 1937” at the nearby Neue Galerie.

I also had several excellent meals, including dinner at the Sea Fire Grill, a half-block from the Barclay, and a happy lunch at Arté on East 9th Street.

My Hamptons host and I then motored out to the Southampton hamlet of Water Mill. After excellent sushi and sashimi at Suki Zuki, we ended the evening in the over-the-top elegance of Bridgehampton’s Topping Rose House.

The next day, after he hit his real estate office, Brown Harris Stevens, in Southampton, we stopped by Hagins & Mortimer Design, a new store featuring important 20th-century artwork and furnishings, and caught a glimpse of Dash, the controversial Kardashian retail venture.

In Sag Harbor, a short jaunt to the north, we had a memorable sidewalk luncheon at the historic American Hotel and wandered down to the marina and the adjacent famed Bay Street Theater, where a matinee of the current production, “Conviction,” was letting out.

Shopping, several opulent open houses, dining at Pierre’s and Bobby Van’s in Bridgehampton…the whirlwind trip wrapped up with a farewell lunch at Silver’s in Southampton, now manned by the fourth generation of the founding family. Stuffed to the gills, I was deposited at Islip for a flight back to reality.

Whatever one needs to know about the Hamptons can be gleaned in the avidly read Dan’s Papers, the local version of The Georgetowner. [gallery ids="101774,141150,141165,141163,141155,141158" nav="thumbs"]

Wally Greeves • June 27, 2014

Whether your arrival is straight from a knee-crunching, 20-hour airline experience or a shuttle over the border from the space-starved city of Hong Kong, the welcoming 20 square kilometers that comprise the world’s largest golf resort at Mission Hills promise plenty of leg room, long irons and lady loopers. Mission Hills Dongguan and Shenzhen edged out Pinehurst in 2004 for the Guinness Book of World Records honor, boasting a total of 12 championship courses. Combine these with the ten additional courses located at Mission Hills Haikou Resort on Hainan Island, and you can see where an eight-day trip there might be an option-wrenching experience for a golfer. No one has expressed anything like real sympathy for me as of yet.

I played my first round of nighttime golf — readily available at all Mission Hills Resorts — at Dongguan. It turned out to be an eerily cool way to deal with jet lag. Time became confusing while sleepily wandering around the fluorescent-filled fairways, sporting oxygen-deprived swollen ankles. Golf balls began resembling Atari asteroids as they rocketed from my clubs and disappeared off screen.

Having arrived skeptical as to how a resort could uniquely differ from so many neighboring golf tracts, I left overwhelmingly impressed. The thick forest-lined Norman course weaved in and around the Mainland China Hills and was probably the most challenging course at Dongguan. The meandering layout promoted solitude, and my inability to speak Mandarin prompted a fun practice of miming out shot intentions to my caddie. Knowledgeable caddie notwithstanding and appreciated, I very much enjoyed playing by myself and will remember this quietly pleasant Norman walkabout for some time. The number of sand traps on the famed Olazabal Course necessitate the creation of greenside outdoor showers and a name change to “Playa Del Iraq,” but make it an outstanding test of shot placement skills.

Mission Hills Shenzhen, a short shuttle away, was no less expansive or inviting. While waxing golf is something I am partial to, no account of time spent here would be complete without addressing the magnitude of activities besides golf that are available to the “golfed-out” and non-golfer. If world-renowned spas, eco-friendly trail hikes, curvy swimming pools or optical illusionary “Trick-Eye Museums” become old hat, guests can go buy new ones in Hong Kong. Culinary possibilities featuring Chinese, Japanese, American and Korean menus are available in venues, ranging from your bed to private dining rooms. A golf course science and technology museum is available for kids (and held my attention), while life-size dioramas espousing resort responsibility for green and responsible growth are educational and captivating. Just walking through the grand ballrooms is fun. Visiting celebrities have all left cement handprints in walkways throughout the grounds, and finding your celebrity match is a popular pastime. Algebraically, I learned that: My Hands < Nick Faldo’s Hands < Yao Ming’s Hands. It was a special treat to play a Pete Dye course in China, where the trademarked railroad-tie designs came complete with the exotic three-noted chimes of emerald doves overseeing play. The highlight round of Dongguan and Shenzhen was the World Cup Course, designed by Jack Nicklaus. Made famous when Fred Couples and Davis Love III won here in 1995, it remains one of the most famous courses in China. I flew into Mission Hills Haikou on Hainan Island, having no idea what to expect, and I was wowed all over again. Hainan Island is generally referred to as the “Hawaii of the East,” as it has the same tropical climate and volcanic rock. I was even necklaced with a flowered lei upon hotel arrival. Mainland Chinese flock here for the relaxed attitude and recreation it provides. The golf courses I played at Haikou were unbelievable. The Blackstone Course, which hosted the exhibition match between Rory and Tiger last October, featured a contrasting trio of lava rock, white sand and green grass in a sharpness that I have never seen before. International awards and competitions litter its pedigree. If Blackstone were the heavyweight, then the Lava Fields Course would be a barroom-brawling cousin. These two courses were more alike than any others I played at Mission Hills, and this was not only forgivable but desirable. I saw the sun rise at Mission Hills Haikou from the Blackstone Course my last day because I had to play it a second time. The amenity base at the Haikou Resort already surpasses anything I have ever seen at a golf resort, and future expansion plans are no less promising. A Lan Kwai Fong shopping, dining, and concert venue to sister the existing one in Hong Kong is set to deliver late this year (think East Asian Times Square), and an entire movie-themed town is also just wrapping up. Hyatt and Hard Rock are under construction. Mission Hills may have most of its golf courses situated, but the Mission Hills brand is just getting underway. Home to the world’s largest spa and mineral springs, the resort is also the largest tennis facility in the world. The vast real estate holdings that make all of this expansion possible could hide a million people, and yet it would not feel crowded. If you want to feel crowded, you can visit nearby Haikou City. Not only did I wander off campus to do this, I even undertook an evening “Hainan Impression” show, showcasing the history of the island. A seafood dinner expedition in town allowed me to pick out whatever I wanted to eat from hundreds of fresh seafood tanks. There are more than 600 golf courses in China, and that number is growing monthly. The sheer numbers associated with the breakout of the Chinese upper middle class is something the world has never seen, and the number of golfers there are predicted to eclipse their American counterparts inside of ten years. Mission Hills Resorts will be there to cater to them, and a family or group trip to China to experience them will round out any American golfer’s resume. The inability to portray the monumental number of experiential possibilities available to me on this trip in a single column leave me no choice but to leave you with this simple directive: Google Mission Hills, and go there. I definitely will be going back soon. [gallery ids="101775,141125,141128,141134,141138,141149,141146,141142" nav="thumbs"]

Georgetowner • June 18, 2014

Dear Stacy:

My friend/coworker is going through a bad divorce. She was struggling for a long time before they separated and I did my best to support her by listening and (sometimes) offering advice. But now it’s all we talk about. It happens during work, on lunch breaks, at happy hour, ALL THE TIME. I don’t even usually ask her how it’s going, she just steers the conversation back to it every single time. I really do feel bad for her situation, but I can’t take this anymore. She has no filter and does not seem to recognize my social cues. She needs a therapist, or a better friend. What can I do?

– Done With Listening

Dear Done,

You actually do sound like a good friend, but a friend who is fed up. That’s okay. Many of us in the field have clients who first came to therapy saying, “My friends are sick of listening to me, so I needed to find someone else.” If you think you can be gentle about it (and I mean really, really gentle), you might suggest that she find someone who is trained to help support a person going through a divorce, because you “know she is hurting” and you “want her to feel better.”

But if she doesn’t take this hint, you should say something about how her struggle is making you feel, because it is making you feel something, and she might not know that. There is no reason to be harsh about it (e.g., “You are such a downer, Louise.”). If you are a good friend, you might be doing her a favor by admitting that her experience has become a burden for you (e.g., “I am noticing that I have a hard time moving on after we talk about your divorce. If I am having this kind of reaction by proxy, I can only imagine how hard it is for you. I really hope you can get to a place where you don’t have to bring this into the office every day. Is there anything I can do to help you with that?”).

Venting is a wonderful – and often necessary – tool for people to express pent-up emotions and move into a better space. But this behavior can be addictive. When we are allowed to take up all the space in a relationship with our own airing of grievances, we don’t always see that we are taking some of that space away from a friend. Acknowledging your true feelings about the circumstances can help steer the friendship back to more of a balance. And if the end result is that she is motivated to find a professional to talk with? Well, then you’ve been the catalyst for a real solution.

Stacy Notaras Murphy (www.stacymurphyLPC.com) is a licensed professional counselor and certified Imago Relationship therapist practicing in Georgetown. This column is meant for entertainment only and should not be considered a substitute for professional counseling. Send your confidential question to stacy@georgetowner.com.

Sarah Bryen • June 4, 2014

Summer’s coming up quickly here in the Virginia countryside. The last of the fox hunters have gone to ground and it’s time for the rest of the sporting season: from the steeplechase races to polo, to the horse show season taking off, to fresh country fare at our local restaurants and farmers markets (yep, we’ll truck some of that in for y’all).

The Upperville Colt & Horse Show, the country’s oldest, began on Monday. Now in its 161st year, the show runs through Sunday, June 8, and features more than 2,000 horse-and-rider competitions. Set on the beautiful grounds of the historic Salem and Grafton Farms, “under the oaks,” Upperville combines everything from the finest show hunters in the country to Olympic-level jumper riders.

For me, personally, some of the best events are the Ladies Sidesaddle Hunters, where attire, or “turn out,” must be perfect down to the sandwich in the sandwich case (judges have been known to take a bite); the famous Upperville Grand Prix; and the leadline division, where tots on ponies are led by their parents.

A little bit more about that. Leadline is held on Saturday following the sidesaddle. Children ages 1-6 will be dressed in their own twee finery, in full-on adorable mode. The Grand Prix, featuring some of the best horses and riders in the world, is held on Sunday.

My suggestion: make a day of it. Pack up your coolers with some tailgate-style foods and beverages (preferably adult, but don’t overdo it), grab some chairs and sit on the hill to watch the jumpers go. There will also be an antique auto show, a petting zoo, a moon bounce and – the most fun – Jack Russell Terrier Races!

One note about Grand Prix day. While it’s not specified in the program, many people will be in “afternoon attire.” Fancy dresses and large hats are not out of place. So if you’ve got it, wear it.

If you discover that you enjoy watching the horses jump around while you sip a cold one, Great Meadow is bringing back its Twilight Jumper Series this year. Held June 27, July 18 and August 29, all Fridays, this event in The Plains brings out both local and professional talent for a Friday evening with dancing and wine tasting. Great Meadow encourages you to pack a tailgate, but note that nearly every event at Great Meadow is to be free of glass bottles, lest one injure a horse.

Great Meadow’s Twilight Polo Series has also begun, continuing on Saturday nights through September. There is dancing as well as polo, and – with the Aspen Dale Winery at the Barn on hand – everyone will have a great time. Check the Great Meadow website for this year’s themes: from Military Appreciation Night to Pirate Night.

Make sure you pop back to Great Meadow for the rest of their events on the card for the summer, including a Fourth of July celebration and, later that month, the WEG selection trials. (Ever want to see someone play high jump on a horse without a saddle? Now’s your chance.) The Virginia Scottish Games are at the end of August, the Wine Festival is in September and the International Gold Cup Steeplechase in October.

I know I’ve encouraged tailgating, but you don’t always want to do the prep before the weekend. So, my other best suggestion is to enjoy some local food. (And wine. Always wine. Especially Virginia wine.) Breaux Vineyards in Purcellville will hold its 17th annual Cajun Festival and Crawfish Boil on June 14, with live music and lots of treats. Then Morven Park in Leesburg will host a NOVA Summer Brewfest on June 21-22, so you can do one weekend of wine and another of beer, both with live music and vendors.

There are other notable wine tours in the area – a quick Google search will bring up plenty. If you go to (www.virginiawine.org), there is a list by date of events for the entire summer. With at least one, and often many, every weekend, you can cherry-pick (grape-pick?) your own tour.

Upperville’s classic eating stops include Hunter’s Head Tavern – where your dog can dine on the patio, incidentally – and the Blackthorne Inn, with its beautiful bar. Another of my personal favorites is The French Hound in Middleburg, where the menu changes in accordance with the “whims of the chef.”
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