Suicide of Beloved Robot Shakes Community

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Tragedy struck the hearts of those who witnessed the death of Georgetown’s very own Robot Steve. His purpose was to patrol the streets in order to keep people safe. But, as it turned out, he himself was the one who needed saving. He had some good times in his six-day life span, but unfortunately his life came to an abrupt and shocking end.

On Monday, July 17, the roving security camera committed what can only be described as a horrifying suicide. Robot Steve allegedly fell into a fountain outside Washington Harbour, and the only thing passersby could do was watch the tragedy unfold.

“We were promised flying cars. Instead we got suicidal robots,” said Bilal Farooqui, an employee at the complex.

Heroic community members attempted to rescue Robot Steve, but it was too late. Exactly how and why the event transpired remains unclear.

A number of citizens have banded together to erect a memorial to the late Robot Steve. Photographs and kind words from near and far were placed onto his charging pad as a way to offer final goodbyes. You will be missed, Robot Steve.

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